Attempt to Like Metal, pt. 2

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Mar 24 2012, 19:29

Shuffle playlist of

1. Mayhem - Psychic Horns - 3/10. What a stunningly bad song. It sounds like he's literally trying to sound as silly as he humanly can, while additionally letting the bells and whistles of the instrumentation make him out to be some insane railway worker. This is not a train I am happy to be on. A line or two ir lyrically interesting. Fairly bad.

2. Rhapsody - Old Age of Wonders - 5/10. That minstrel feeling is all over this one, in a ballad of sorts about elves and jesters. Am I two years old? When the drums kick in for a chorus, the melody gets bouncy and somewhat enjoyable. If the entirety of the song was like that, I'd oblige to calling it decent. I guess I could wander around Skyrim to this.

3. Forgotten Tomb - Springtime Depression - 7/10. Last I checked, this was one of those black metal bands that made my heart flutter with how good they are, and though I got the only instrumental of the record here, I find myself loving the melancholia in it. I do miss that about metal: the sad feelings it can evoke. I forgive its repetitiveness.

4. Estatic Fear - Des Nachtens Suss' Gedone - n/a. Too short to judge, especially from an album with songs so long that it's only four tracks. This opens up for a doom metal release, and the sadness that it's got going for it is pretty evident. I wish I had gotten one of their metal tracks to compare to, but it's alright.

5. Liquid Tension Experiment - Three Minute Warning, Pt. 5 - 5/10. I've always really hated that band name. The dudes from Dream Theater have always been talented at what they do, but I remember this project being too technical and wanky for me. This closing track and suite-ender to this album rings true with that, sadly.

6. Black Sabbath - After Forever - 5/10. Not only it is cool because this is the first metal band, but it's from an album that I surprisingly haven't bothered to hear yet. I feel like I used to really love Ozzy, but that he's somehow way less interesting than the piece of dirt I just picked off my shoe. This one just kind of rolls around boringly.

7. Shadow Gallery - Interlude 5 - n/a. This is only eighteen seconds, and I should have made a rule exempting tracks that can't be rated for the overall score of this thing. Nevertheless, I might as well fill space and say that I'm sad when I remember Mike Baker (ex-vocalist of Shadow Gallery) died a few years ago. He was great.

8. Behemoth - The Nephilim Rising - 4/10. I can never, ever understand the vocals of this band. Listening to something like this just makes me feel insane, with an occasional guitar squeal in the background to keep everything grounded in reality. A song about half-angel half-human hybrids, with a few spoken words passages. Ugh.

9. Royal Hunt - Memory Lane - 5/10. That neo-progressive metal vibe is one that I used to dig around for until I couldn't get enough of it, but I've grown tired of it. I unfortunately got saddled with yet another instrumental, and while I know something like this would have made me erect years ago, I'm limp through all of this.

10. Skid Row - I Remember You - 9/10. One of the best power ballads of all time? Here to save the day? I guess I can allow that, because Skid Row was one of my favorite heavy metal/hair metal bands back when this was all relevant to my life. That voice, especially in, "Oh my darling, I LOVE YOU!!" near the final chorus... you know you love it.


pt. 2: 5.4/10
pt. 1: 5.8/10
TOTAL: 5.6/10

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