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hiroki_666
Well, I hope you had a nice and non-stressful day at the university, and also hope you brought a very comfortable pillow to the 4-hour play, as it's always important to sleep comfortably, hahaha just kidding again :P. Then again, have another nice day, tomorrow I will have to find my "philosopher deep within me" as Mark would say, as I have a philosophy class :D
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hiroki_666
The album is great, both in sound and lyrics, personally, it's my favorite Epica album, and I think the lyrics for the song 'Requiem for the Indifferent' is one of the best lyrics written by Mark, I really really like it! :D. Indeed, it's their most complex album, that's why it's hard to get its feeling in a first listen, you have to listen to it more and more until it grows on you, at least for me it was like that, even though I loved it since the first listen. I think people say that Mark's vocals ruin the song because they don't like Epica at all, or maybe they think of harsh vocals as a bad thing just used for bands to sound more aggressive. But I wouldn't get the same "energy" from the songs without Mark's vocals, so his vocals are a huge contributive part to the songs as a whole. Oh, I do like Epica's cover of Crystal Mountain, especially its epic ending, I think it's awesome! :D What about you? Do you like it?
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hiroki_666
I'm also not really in touch with these 'i-gadgets', and I have to admit that sometimes I feel kinda "allergic to tecnology", I mean, we don't really need all these things, iPads, iPhones, etc. Maybe some people do need them for work, that's fine, but for popular use, I see it more as something that distracts people from their true selves and from society, and separate people more and more, because it makes them stay in their own world of illusions and pleasures, but of course, it's not always that this happens, but it happens so much that it's capable of making me kinda repulsive to it :P. But I also know that it would be pretty bad to be a week without my pc too, although I wish I could live in a way that is more connected to nature, but nowadays it's too difficult. Oh, now I saw Mark's tribal-looking pic :D. I wonder what is it for, if it's for a videoshoot or something like that, it kinda reminded me of Black Swan mixed with ancient mayan tribes haha :P
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hiroki_666
If this guy who writes hateful comments likes doing this, then I feel sad for him, because I wouldn't be able to be happy if I lived like this, so full of hate, but maybe he is so tr00 that he must breathe hate and hail Satan, haha, just kidding :P. And that's it, I completely agree with you, and if you know it in theory, why can't you feel happy very often? Btw, do you feel sad very often? Not feeling happy doesn't necessarily means that you feel sad, so that's why I asked. And about stress, that's the right to do, not waste all your energy on things that in the end don't really need to be so rushed up, and don't mean as much as we think they do, in other words, we don't need to attach ourselves to stress or stressful things.
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hiroki_666
And that's true, usually the majority gives them this sense of security, but I think they feared me because they didn't know me, and we humans always fear the unknown, and we also usually imagine the worst about the unknown, and fear our own thoughts about it. They always thought I was some kind of evil genius, as I had good grades and at the same time totally anti-social. Well, that's probably what happened both to you and me, people just followed the opinion of the majority, to feel more safe and socially accepted, but not everyone hated us :P. Oh, I also have this feeling about university! I feel comfortable and free in a way I never felt in school, because people are more mature, and tolerant, and share some similar interests and all this stuff, and also because they don't expect me to be shy, which is like everything I always wanted in a class, haha. :D
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hiroki_666
He thinks that, in order to live peacefully, he must have no anger inside him, he is right, but expressing the anger, sharing this anger, and hurting the others only create more and more suffering, both to the agressor and to the victim, so this is sometimes kind of a desperation, he is desperate to run away from all the bad feelings and thoughts that haunt him, that at the same time he generates more of it, because he isn't conscious enough to know that what he is doing is what harms him (and the others) the most. But about the emotional barrier, exactly the same thing happens to me, I grew up not used to express my thoughts, nor my emotions, and when I do it with my family, I also feel very weird, because it's like they are very close to me, but don't really know me very well, because I never expressed myself, so I sometimes wonder if something I said sounded too weird for them or not, because they are not used to me being fully myself, they are just used to me being a shy person.
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hiroki_666
Yeah, that's what I think too, having already experienced how it is to suffer "in the hands of other people" I know that I would never do that to anyone, and also because it's pointless and very harmful to create suffering to others and act motivated by it, or motivated by anger and feelings that could lead me to any aggressive behaviour. And that's true, people usually mistreat others without even thinkg of how the person will react to this, that happens because they usually just act unconsciously, by influence of these feelings that lead to aggressive behaviour, as I said, feelings like anger, fear, envy, etc.. It might sound strange that I say they act unconsciously, but that's what happens, for example: someone who hates another person, it's totally bad to live with this anger, right? So what does he do to deal with it? He acts by influence of it, and becomes aggressive with the one he hates, hoping that maybe by expressing his anger, he can live more peacefully,
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hiroki_666
Oh, I haven't seen the pic he uploaded yesterday, when I see new pics that he post, he is usually with Laura, which is nice, they are a beautiful couple :P. Anyways, I'm sure you had a good day today, because it seems your copy of RFTI has finally arrived, hasn't it? If so, tell me what you think about the album! :D. Well, I am going to sleep now, then again, I hope you have a nice day :D
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hiroki_666
This conclusion you got about unhappiness is like the most basic truth about it, that's exactly what happens, when we are unhappy we must have a bigger reason to live, because the worse our situation is, the bigger is the potential it has for us to change it to its opposite, it depends only on us to change it or to continue surviving to it, and also depends on how conscious we are to see this potential for changing. And I agree with you about computers, it all depends on how you use it, and unfortunately most people don't use it in a positive way, that's why people got this negative image about the internet, and this negative image is also related to this infinite number of eletronic gadgets we have today, like iPhone, iPad, and all this things that usually keep us "in our world", or inside our minds, and sometimes I think they are really bad things, because it's making some people (mainly kids and teenagers) forget simple things that make living in society something pleasant.
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hiroki_666
And being alive is the greatest gift we could ever receive, and we should be thankful for that during our whole existence, and having this knowledge, and actually feeling thankful for this makes us humans, makes us feel more part of the whole humanity, makes us also more down-to-earth, as we realize we aren't perfect, and we're never supposed to be or even going to be greater than nature and its order. But anyways, it's good that you are more optimistic, and completely normal that you feel "attracted" to the negative feelings and thoughts, because they were very strong within you during a time in your life, as you said. But be careful to don't use this stress to trigger more and more negative feelings, because that happens very frequently, but as our conscious evolves and we become capable of noticing this aspect in ourselves, it slowly begins to grow weaker.
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hiroki_666
About Mark, I think he follows the Jungian thought that says (not sure if it's exactly like this in english): "Any tree that wants to touch the skies must have roots deep to the point of touching hell" so he in order to be the great person he is, he must always stay down-to-earth :D. YEAH, I totally agree with you, egocentric is the last thing you could call Mark. Maybe the guy who said this doesn't even know what egocentrism is, or probably he is an egocentric, and doesn't accept/know this about himself and unconsciously projects it in Mark, hehe :P.About happiness and smiling, I think that it's kinda strange that we search for a reason to smile or to be happy, because I think life already gives us everything we need to be happy and smile everyday, I mean, we're healthy, we're able to do things that we like, we're able to communicate with others, we're also able to give our unique and emotional meaning to everything, I mean, we are ALIVE.
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hiroki_666
So I was always left out alone, with my 2 friends, who were the only people I could talk to about the things I like, and when I tried to talk to another person I was always ridicularized, and people used to laugh at me, because I was "so strange" according to them, but instead of wanting to end these things, I just wanted to ignore as much as I could, and I used to think that they were all idiots, that I really shouldn't create any relationship with "these kind of pepole", that they were inferior. But anyways, on high school things gradually started to become better, and now everything is great :D. Yeah, this kind of negative and destructive thoughts can lead you all the way down to depression, which slowly leads to death, so it's very very important that we keep positive and good thoughts in our minds, because our body directly reacts to our thoughts, so that's important to keep both our physical and mental health.
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hiroki_666
True story, thankfully we've moved on, but those hard times on school were necessary to make us who we are today, so we should really be thankful for that, even if it was painful :). Oh, I get it, you grew up without having the habit of always expressing your feelings, also by influence of your parents, so you feel unnatural, BUT, about the situations in which you overcame this barrier and was able to say something nice, or express your feelings better, have you ever asked yourself what was the difference between these moments and the ones you wanted to say something nice but was stopped? What is this thing that motivated you so much that made you overcome this barrier at certain moment, while at others, it was insufficient? That sucks, I was kinda like that too during school, I had good grades, I also was shy, and liked different and "non-popular things", but instead of people hating me, they used to fear me.
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hiroki_666
That's true, but what is funny is that at this moment when I used to overthink everything I already knew that it was useless, even though I could not stop acting like this, it seems that this idea wasn't really enough for me to change, I think what made me change was the knowing of myself, and by knowing myself I know that I want to act always naturally, and I know what "is this naturally", so doing this overthinking thing changed as I grew as a person, I think, as I gained more self-esteem and more knowledge about my emotions and everything about me, things that used to be too confused or even "misty" inside me. And that's exactly the point, we have to be ourselves, but to be ourselves we have to know who we really are, so the more you know about yourself, the better is your "inner and outer living" :D.
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hiroki_666
It would be a pleasure to talk to Mark about psychology-related stuff, hope I can do that one day! :P. I wasn't sure about what to study on college until last year (I started on college this year), but other than psychology I was thinking about studying maybe philosophy, or history, but when I met psychology it was love at first sight haha :P. Well, thanks! Indeed I had a nice day today, and I hope you had too, I also hope your copy of RFTI arrived today and you enjoyed the album! :D. Btw, no need to be sorry for the 100 shouts, we are having such a nice talk that I am more likely to be thankful for that :D
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hiroki_666
Yeah, that's very true, some people basically start talking to another for these reasons, both in real life and internet, but if someone like this comes to us with these intentions and then lose interest in us, at least it's good for us :P. Also, sometimes people are afraid of the others in the internet, so they get kinda repulsive, thinking that everyone might be fake or something like that, so these people usually don't have many "virtual friends" and maybe don't have friends at all, but when this kind of fear is not the case, then I can't understand that either, because there is nothing bad in starting a friendship! It's always good to get to know new people, with similar interests or not, it's always humanly enriching, and pleasing too, and it also tests your ability to live with the differences, which is a very good thing to have. Oh, that's nice! I'll totally send this email them to nominate Epica :D.
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hiroki_666
I'm sure that these materialistic people will realize their mistakes at one point in their lives, if they don't do it, then it's really sad for them, because they wasted a life that is so much bigger than the pleasures the material world can give, but I think it's never too late to fix one's life, as long as the desire to change is real and strong, then it's always possible. But that's the point, these kind of girls who only care about money are not happy, even though for some people they might be, that's not happiness at all, that is just pleasure bought by money, and if she can buy all the pleasures she want, she might look happy, but when no pleasure can fill her needs and greeds anymore, that's when she might experience the biggest feeling of emptiness and sadness of her life, and at that moment she has basically two choices, keep lying to herself to try to escape from this feeling, or realize the mistakes she has made, and start to change her life in a good way.
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hiroki_666
And yes, that's the point in being positive! If you think you will succeed, you are almost half way up to succeding, the other half comes from your ability to stay focused on this objective until you succeed in it. I know how it is when it comes to be apathetic, I used to be like this not too long time ago, only 2 years ago, maybe, and I was so unhappy and depressed for such a long time, that it was painful living with a little voice in my head that kept telling me I should commit suicide, and I got to a point in which I decided to look for a psychologist, because I couldn't live with myself anymore, and that's when the things started to become better and better for me, made me learn a lot about myself, and change all this bad things, thoughts, and everything that kept my living painful. And what was the biggest mistake you could have made in your life? Sorry to ask that so directly, answer only if you feel comfortable to say it, do not feel obliged or anything like that.
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hiroki_666
Btw, why did your classmates hate you? Just because you were shy? Anyways, classmates can be cruel with people who aren't as sociable as them, it really sucks. But it makes me happy to see that you abandoned this idea that you are worse than everyone and all that negativity, because this kind of idea is very poor, don't you think? It makes us limited people, limited and used to the worst, and when we overcome this kind of thing, we evolve as humans, we see our life in a much wider and more positive point of view, which makes our lives much better :D. Oh, I envy you for taking a picture with Mark! hahaha :P. He is one of my biggest idols, in every aspect, as a person, as a musician, and hopefully one day I will be able to take a picture with him and maybe talk to him about psychology and all this stuff :). But also, why do you smile very rarely? Don't you feel the happiness of living everyday?
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hiroki_666
Could it be this unnatural sensation that I've said? Maybe you think that it would probably sound strange and end up not saying, but that's probably just because you are used to be shy, just like me, and reactions that go away from this pattern still face a little barrier to happen, a barrier we create, with this conditioning. Or maybe it is the fear of the reaction the person will have, thiking that maybe he/she won't understand your intentions the way you want to express it, and also it's possible that you fear that you might be incapable of expressing it clearly, an end up not saying, well there are many possibilities. And I totally know how you feel when you prefer to do things alone or be alone, I also feel like that, because around people that expect me to be shy, I feel a strong barrier stopping me from acting the way I want, and end up acting like a shy person, but the best thing would be if we could overcome this barrier, even with this people that are used to our shyness.
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hiroki_666
During the school I only had like 2 friends, and also, the only thing we (me and my friends) wanted at that time was to play videogames or play online games all the day, we didn't really care much about people, and that was part of "the world of llusions" I had created for myself, that was one of the things I created to take my attention away from myself e focus only on the games, and these times were difficult, because there were lots of inner-transformations in me and I didn't respect that, I wanted to forget about me, and that made me a "separated" person, separated in the meaning of my inner me was suffering so much and my outer me only wanted more pleasure, more games, and more distraction. But anyways, it's great that you overcame this excessive thinking, but about people thinking that you are a cold/not-caring person, what is this thing that stops you from saying something nice for someone? Have you ever asked yourself about this?
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hiroki_666
Now I am the one saying that it sounds so familiar, that's the story of my life! :P. I also never know how to react around new people, and I am usually afraid to do or to say something that might "push people away" from me and make they get the wrong idea about me, I also used to overthink every little reaction of me, which made me a very limited and probably uninteresting person, because I was like: "I'm going to say/do only the things that I know the reaction people will have to it" but I'm not like that anymore, I just try to act naturally, because in the end, how can we be 100% sure about anyone's reaction to us? We can't, it's impossible, we just have to get used to this uncertainty, because each people reacts in a unique way, and we never know it until we express ourselves to them. And I am also "socially undeveloped" basically for the same reason as you.
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hiroki_666
I completely agree with you! It's natural to be talkative and open with people who think similar to you, but I am usually afraid of people on the internet because lots of them ARE NOT natural. I've talked to many of these people, and they just kinda talk to you because you talked to them, and not for interest in knowing another person, and perhaps making a good friend! They pass me the image of cold, depressed and anti-social people, which is not really attractive for me. Oh, I haven't read about it yet, actually, I just went to google now to find more about it because I really don't know what is it about. hehe xD. Well, I'm getting some sleep now, it's 1am here in Brazil and I have to be up at 8:30am, for college, and btw, I study psychology, that's probably one of the reasons I like Epica's lyrics so much :D. Anyways, have a good.. I don't know where you live, or what time is it now, so have a good day! If you reply to me today, I'll surely answer as soon as possible :)
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hiroki_666
and also based on the values we give to stuff and people too, so that's why each person has a different point of view and different lifestyle. And that's true, about the number of materialistic people becoming higher as time passes, but you know what I think about this? I think the world is getting closer to its "rebirth" because you know, when a mother gives birth to a child, she feels an inhumanly amount of pain, and afterwards she feels the most intense happiness of her life, which is the gift of having a child, and that's what's happening to the world, we are now feeling this inhumanly amount of pain, but that's necessary! Because afterwards we might experience life as never before, in a higher level, but that's just my idea, feel free to disagree with it if you think so :P. Oh, thank you! Makes me feel much better that you are as open as I am being here, it's making our conversation such a nice one, don't you think?! :D
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hiroki_666
and that's exactly what happened in that concert, and I'm very, very grateful for that! Then again, I really know how you feel, I used to be very pessimistic, but also by influence of my father, because even though he is a great person, he is too "revolted" with the world nowadays, and I used to grab his negativity for me, kind of unconsciously, and that made my teenage very difficult at times, but I made it through, and stopped creating useless inner-negativity, stopped creating suffering for myself, and looked to life as a beautiful gift for every living being, and it doesn't matter how negative the world is, I know I am doing my part to "heal the world" by being as positive as possible! Because we are all connected, after all :P. And it's really good that you changed your point of view, I would even say that this is one of the best things someone can do to him/herself, because the world we live is all in our mind, it's all based on how we see stuff ( still continues...)
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hiroki_666
It means that shyness becomes my identity and my mind becomes conditioned to react only based on the reactions of a shy person, and whatever reactions I might express, that goes out of this pattern, makes me feel strange, and makes me feel like I'm not being myself. Have you ever felt like this before? If not, then that's great! hehe :D. But I know how you feel about becoming nervous in this kind of situation, still, when I go to a concert, I go with the idea that it's going to be the best concert ever, and that I'm going to enjoy it at maximum, and I think that takes me out of my mind for a while and focus my attention fully on the concert, then I always have a lot o fun in metal concerts, even if I usually go alone. And that's great that you met new friends after the Epica concert! :D. Sometimes great things happen when we don't expect it, don't you think? I never imagined I would meet anyone at a concert, because as I said, I had the fixed idea that I was too shy for that.
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hiroki_666
Oh, another thing we have in common! I'm also, a very shy person, usually, even though I used to be more, in the past. But it's still difficult for me to express myself in person, mainly my emotions, and it's still difficult to talk to "unknown" people and make new friends and all this kind of stuff that needs social abilities, you know? BUT one thing that makes me feel better and made my life much "lighter" since I learned it, is this idea that I have totally embraced, the idea that nothing IS, everything is eternally BEING, it's like, I'm not shy, I am just being shy, one day I won't be anymore, because everything is in constant transformation. If I construct the habit (which I did during my whole life) of saying to myself that I AM a shy person, in time I will get so attached to this idea that I will actually BE a shy person. What does this mean? (To be continued.. :P)
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hiroki_666
ANYWAYS, SORRY for talking so much about myself, I mean, I just met you, and I'm talking about personal things about me, it might sound very strange, or odd to you. But just to tell, I'm not fake, or anything like that, I'm just Brazilian, that's just the way we are, very talkative :P.
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hiroki_666
Oh, that's cool! Epica concerts are always awesome, they really deserve their success. :D I hope to see them live again as soon as possible! Also, you mentioned one thing I usually question myself, which is: Why do people usually don't like to go to concerts alone? The only concert I went with friends was Epica's, but other than this one, every other I went I was alone, and still, the concerts were all awesome! But still about the Epica's concert, I would even dare to say that my life before it was one, and after it, it completely became another. That's because I met a girl, who nowadays is just a friend of mine, who made me see lots of wrong things about myself, and she "woke me up" from the world of illusions and suffering I had been creating for myself throughout my whole life, and I created it as a kind of protection, etc etc.
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hiroki_666
I admit that I really get surprised when people don't like his lyrics, because his words make a lot of sense, and are also very enriching, but maybe people don't get it. For me, Mark's intentions are always to awake our minds, awake from the fake reality of the world of perception, awake us from the attachment to things that prevents us to evolve as humans, awake from the attachment to physical and mental pleasure, which leads to an addictive, stagnant and poor lifestyle, etc, and the best thing is that he really shows the ways to do it, for example by "returning to the laws of the nature" or also "trying to find the philosopher deep within us". This things can make a HUGE difference in the way we live our lives, once we comprehend it fully and apply it to our lives. Anyways,I don't really care about this childish and immature people, but when I saw that comment, it kinda hit me, but as I don't get attached to suffering anymore, I just let it go. :P (...continue on the next post, hehe)
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hiroki_666
Oh, really?! Makes me happy to see that you liked it! :D. When I posted it, another guy replied to it like just laughing, then I felt really disrespected, but decided to accept his opinion, even if he expressed it negatively. Anyways, I hope you enjoy 'Requiem for the Indifferent' as much as I did and still do :D. Oh, I've actually only seen Epica live once, when they came here to Brazil in 2010 , it was my first metal concert ever! And the best one, so far. Lots of things changed in my life 'because of them' in a certain and kinda indirect way. And also their concert is so full of energy! They even played the Imperial March, and no one expected that! :P. But what about you? Have you ever been to any Epica concert?
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hiroki_666
Hey there! Thanks for the add, you have an awesome musical taste :D. And also, I'd like to comment that your profile makes a lot of sense! I mean, Storm The Sorrow was your last scrobble, and you say that you'd really really like to meet happiness. Storming the sorrow is a way to do it :P
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stavros_epica
I was gonna order the mail order edition too,but when i saw the shipping price i changed my mind.The shipping for my country costs 14 euros ,so if i had bought it,i would had paid 45 euros in total :/ Anyway,i'm off to bed now :P Cya soon i hope :)
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stavros_epica
oh lol :P You might get it earlier.A few guys in the forums have already received their copies!Which edition did you order?To be honest,im not the biggest fan of death metal,but i like a few songs from Amon Amarth and Eluveitie so i might as well like Mayan :P
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stavros_epica
hahahaha did she really say that or was it just her expression?:P Well,i've listened to every song of the album except for serenade of self destruction because only the instumental version of that song was leaked lol!But it's truly awesome!I absolutely LOOOOVE every song of the album :) I especially like the title track(I think it sounds like a mix of Desing your universe and fools of damnation,but it's possible im wrong,i have listened to it only a few times),avalanche(reminds of a little of chasing the dragon :D ),internal warfare and monopoly on truth but the rest is amazing too!
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stavros_epica
Damn,forgot to ask you another question.Since you didn't go to their concert in 2010,when did you go to their concert?Before the DYU tour?And it's amazing that they care so much about their fans :P I mean,most bands wouldn't give a sh*t :P
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stavros_epica
Yeah,i follow him on facebook and i've noticed that too :) I'm shy too.I mean i'm sucha big fan and i think i wouldn't be able to say "hi" to him,let alone to....Simone :P I could just faint in front of her :P Ok that wouldn't happen but still xD
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stavros_epica
I've also heard some other people describe him that way :) He seems great.What did you talk about? :) And how was the rest of the band?Did you talk to any other member of the band?:) Sorry for flooding you with questions .but i just can't help but wonder :P No,unfortunately haven't seen them live :( I discovered them like 7 months ago.They came in Greece back in 2010 and the show was great(i ve watched the show on youtube)!
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stavros_epica
That's nice of you,but i couldn't wait until friday.I had the choice to end the torture of waiting at once :P BTW,how was Mark when you met him?Was he friendly?:)
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stavros_epica
Yeah i do :) I just downloaded the whole album and im lovin' it so far(I've only listened to the first 5 tracks so far).Have you listened to it ?:)
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stavros_epica
Hey :) Thnx for the add.Your taste is awesome and so is your avatar :) I see you've met Mark and probably the rest of the band :D That's great :)
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MyHeartofHearts
Happy New Year to you and your loved ones.............. Love from Hearts in Detroit. :~D
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SonGoncalves
I am also happy to know that you are well! I am working in a factory that makes parts for Honda Motors, I'm machine operator. It's not what I like to do ... I got this job out of necessity. But starting next year, want to get something related to my studies chemistry. I went to the Epica show here in Sao Paulo who had last year. They are really great musicians, I find it amazing their evolution to the new disc. :-D When you finish your studies? After you plan to live in Sofia, or return permanently to their home town? Do you have trouble making friends, really? (How did you make friends with a stranger who lives in Brazil?):-D You always seemed to be an extremely nice person. ^ ^ Tarja's concert, which was never cool in a show of it ... Great show for you! \ o / 'll Add you there. :-) I apologize that this time the giant message. ^ ^ See you later ...
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SonGoncalves
Hello Joana, like these? Been a long time we do not speak the same ... My life has changed a bit, I changed jobs, I'm dating ... and next year begin studies at the University of Chemical. I noticed that you fell in love with Epica. Do you have Facebook? Still lives in Sofia? What has changed in recent times of your life? Sorry for having been slow to respond ... I simply forgot, sorry. Hug!
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